Christmas is hereby Cancelled!

Posted by deckert | Dec 22, 2013 @ 02:36 AM | 11,205 Views

It appears the FAA, Homeland Security and Santa Claus are at odds with each other. In a surprise move today, the Federal Aviation Administration and Homeland Security joined forces to unilaterally deny domestic air space clearance to the traditional Christmas Eve sleigh ride by Santa Claus. While filing his flight plan for Christmas Eve, the FAA had new rules, regulations and stipulations that have to be met before domestic travel.

1. Santa must comply with a full body search and provide photo ID.

2. All his Reindeer must submit to body cavity examinations.

3. All of Santa's packages will need to be unwrapped for inspection.

Ron Burgundy, head bunghole searcher for the FAA, stated, "Look we understand its Santa but no one is above the letter of the law, it's a safety issue, if we let Santa through where does it end.

Santa's ride has been bringing joy and happiness to millions of children for generations.Irate parents worldwide are said to be absolutely distraught. "Who's going to eat the milk and cookies for a start?" asked one parent. Another distraught parent asked, "Who's going to put the coal into our elected officials stockings?"

Homeland Security has said that any penetration into American air space will be considered an act of aggression as part of their duty in keeping American airspace and borders safe. A spokesman from Homeland Security told us, "We just can't have every jolly, rosy cheeked, white haired fruitcake...Continue Reading

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Christmas Weather

Posted by deckert | Dec 20, 2013 @ 02:40 AM | 10,604 Views

There’s just something so darn peaceful about big huge flakes gently coming down, 27degrees, no wind, no tracks, no vehicles, warm fire, good brandy, great wife,good food, covered porch and dead silence under a full moon in the mountains with big ol pine/fir trees surrounding you and a small gentle creek gurgling along.

Merry Christmas to ALL!

Dan

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