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Old Nov 23, 2002, 03:14 PM
DNA
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NE Ohio
Joined Jun 2001
3,311 Posts
General Aviation Rules

The hardest thing about flying is the ground.

When one engine fails on a twin engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.

Never trade luck for skill.

The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are, "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?" and " Ooh Sh..!", or "Hold my beer and watch this!"

Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

Airspeed, altitude or brains: two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.

If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- or, unsafe.

Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.

Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding it or doing anything about it.

When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten.

When a crash seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slowly and gently as possible.
If an airplane is still in one piece, don't cheat on it; ride the sucker down.

Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.

There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.

The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time.

What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If an air traffic controller screws up, the pilot dies.

Basic Flying Rules: 1. Try to stay in the middle of the air. 2. Do not go near the edges of it. 3.The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there.

You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.
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