|Oct 03, 2012, 10:42 AM|
It ain't near the joy of rubbing on a 38 double D but I do think a 36D is more asthetically pleasing. Hey , I thnk 'm gonna name my next airplane the B-36D.
Oh, someone already beat me to it.
|Oct 04, 2012, 12:47 AM|
His wife had been after him for several weeks to paint the seat on the toilet. Finally, he got around to doing it while she was out. After finishing, he left to take care of another matter before she returned.
She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in the shower, she sat on the toilet. As she tried to stand up, she realized that the not-quite-dry epoxy paint had glued her to the toilet seat.
About that time, he got home and realized her predicament.
They both pushed and pulled without any success whatsoever. Finally, in desperation, he undid the toilet seat bolts. His wife wrapped a sheet around herself and he drove her to the hospital emergency room.
The ER Doctor got her into a position where he could study how to free her (try to get a mental picture of this.).
She tried to lighten the embarrassment of it all by saying, "Well, Doctor, I'll bet you've never seen anything like this before."
The Doctor replied, "Actually, I've seen lots of them......
I just never saw one mounted and framed before."
|Oct 04, 2012, 02:21 AM|
|Oct 04, 2012, 08:28 AM|
|Oct 04, 2012, 07:03 PM|
Dating in 1957…
You need to be able to remember the era to really enjoy this... But even if
you’re not old enough, this is funny, anyway!
It was hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1957 and Fred had a date with
Peggy Sue. He arrived at her house and rang the bell.
"Oh, come on in!" Peggy Sue's mother said as she welcomed Fred in. "Have a
seat in the living room. Would you like something to drink…Lemonade? Iced tea?"
"Iced tea, please," Fred said. Mom brought the iced tea.
"So, what are you and Peggy planning to do tonight?" she asked.
"Oh, probably catch a movie, and then maybe grab a bite to eat at the malt
shop, maybe take a walk on the beach..."
"Peggy likes to screw, you know," Mom informed him.
"Uh...really?" Fred replied, with raised eyebrows.
"Oh, yes!" the mother continued. "When she goes out with her friends, that's
all they do!"
"Is that so?" asked Fred, incredulous.
"Yes," said the mother. "As a matter of fact, she'd screw all night if we let
"Well, thanks for the tip," Fred said as he began thinking about alternate
plans for the evening.
A moment later, Peggy Sue came down the stairs looking pretty as a picture
wearing a pink blouse and full circle skirt, and with her hair tied back in a
bouncy ponytail. She greeted Fred.
"Have fun, kids," the mother said as they left.
Half an hour later, a completely disheveled Peggy Sue burst into the house and
slammed the front door behind her.
"The Twist, Mom!" she angrily yelled at her mother. "The damned dance is
called the Twist!"
|Oct 04, 2012, 10:18 PM|
Q:What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef!
|Oct 04, 2012, 10:21 PM|
What do you call a quadriplegic in a swimming pool?
What do you call a quadriplegic in a jacuzzi?
What do you call a quadriplegic in a catapult?
|Oct 05, 2012, 03:52 AM|
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