The universe never did make sense; I suspect it was built on government contract.

You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once.

Being right too soon is socially unacceptable.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.

I also think there are prices too high to pay to save the United States. Conscription is one of them. Conscription is slavery, and I don't think that any people or nation has a right to save itself at the price of slavery for anyone, no matter what name it is called. We have had the draft for twenty years now; I think this is shameful. If a country can't save itself through the volunteer service of its own free people, then I say: Let the damned thing go down the drain!

Widows are far better than brides. They don't tell, they won't yell, they don't swell, they rarely smell, and they're grateful as hell.

Heinlein, all.

Originally Posted by bildo baggins

Winston Churchill is also the man

• Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if I were your wife, I'd poison your tea.
  Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.

• Bessie Braddock: Sir, you are drunk.
  Churchill: And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.

I like those two very much.

The trouble with normal is that it always gets worse. === Bruce Cockburn


Beer quotes.

Beer - So much more than just a breakfast drink.

24 hours in a day. 24 beers in a case ... coincidence?

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? - W.C. Fields

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. -Ernest Hemingway

American beer is like making love in a canoe. It's f*cking close to water. - Monty Python

And God said: Let there be vodka! And He saw that it was good. Then God said: Let there be light! And then He said: Whoa - too much light.

As a rule, I don't drink -- as a habit, I do!

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

Beer - The reason I wake up every afternoon.

Beer contains Vitamin Pee.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 1862!

Beer: Now THERE'S a temporary solution.

Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your beer.

Dough, the stuff, that buys my beer, Ray, the guy that tends the bar, Me, the guy, who drinks my beer, Far, the distance to the bar, So, I think I'll have a beer, La, Laa lAA lAh LaH LAA LAAAH! Tea, no thanks I want a beer, which brings us back to Dough Dough Dough!

Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.

Give a man a beer, he'll waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, he'll waste a lifetime.

I don't drink anymore. Of course, I don't drink any less, either.

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. - Frank Sinatra

I have a drink to celebrate the little things. Like Tuesdays - we only have one of those a week!

I killed a six-pack just to watch it die.

I swear to drunk I'm not God!

I'd rather have a beer than win father of the year. - Homer Simpson

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy. -Tom Waits

Some are bad but there are more if you like.
Go to page 1 2 3 next here.
http://coolsig.com/beer1.html

This thread is going to be a funny one to keep up with.
Thanks Bildo.

Originally Posted by MtnGoat

as we're finding out...

I love reading Lewis. A very wise man that one.

That was most certainly the thought in his "That Hideous Strength."

I thought it was a hat, when I put it on... Then I heard my dad yell, "where's my toilet plunger gone?" Shel Silverstein (I may have muddied this one but that's how I remember it)

Killing is my business and business is good

Megadeth

That thang runs like a raped ape!

Redneck buddy NC

If you are in a fair fight, you planned poorly - a Marine

"Love is 2 minutes and 52 seconds of squelching noises" Johnny Rotten
"There's nothing glorious in dying. Anyone can do it" Johnny Rotten
"Do you know they're now producing eating dogs for the anorexics?" Prince Philip
"Like being savaged by a dead sheep" UK Labour politician Dennis Healey on being criticized by the mild mannered Tory minister Geoffrey Howe in the UK House of Commons in June 1978

Originally Posted by Moe M.

IN a perfect world.

In reality, that sort of socialism only works in team sports, but even then, the stronger players are always expected to carry the weaker players, that's why, as in the game of life, the stronger players always get the bigger bucks, because they deserve a bigger share of the rewards.

That is true equality.

Moe M.

a word of advice Moe; NEVER even suggest anything but adulation for Bill Shankly to a Liverpool football supporter
Another of his sayings:
Some people think that football's a matter of life or death, but it's much more important than that.

and I think to myself it's a wonderful world../

Louis Armstrong

"He who tries to be strong everywhere at once is weak everywhere at once."

[ Sun Tzu ]

I wish I had a dime for every dime I have
Arthur

"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left."

[ George Carlin ]

Maybe the best lines have already been taken, but here's my favorite.

"A nickle just ain't worth a dime anymore." - Yogi Berra