|Jan 15, 2007, 10:26 PM|
The Travleing Salesman
This is the story of a travleing salesman, and as travleing salesman stories go his car brokedown one rainy night on a deserted highway. After walking to the only house with lights on, a 3 story brick castle, he knocks on the door and is greeted by a smallish man with glasses who says "Yes, may I help you ." The salesman explaines his situation and the little fellow invites him in for a warm meal and to spend the night, and come morning his personal mechanic will fix his car.
After a hearty meal of everything you could speak of and then some, the little guy says "Jeeves here will show you where you can sleep, but first, I want to show you some thing."
Going down a long hallway and collecting some blue bannanas they soon come to a small dock with a small row boat tied up to it. ( Still somewhere in the huge house ) they get into the boat and row out aways to a small island with one lone palm tree.
Thats when the man says 'Watch this." He then throws a blue bannana out onto the island and a very larg green gorrila jumps down out of the tree and eats the blue bannana and jumps back into the tree. The salesman says " Wow, thats neat. I ain't never seen anything like it before." So the little man rows closer and tosses another blue bannana out and here comes the green gorrila and picks up the bannana when all of a sudden the salesman reaches out to touch the gorrila and the little man screams "No, don't do that." Pulling his arm back the salesman watches in horror as the gorrila beats his chest and roars.
So then the little man takes the salesman back up stairs and shows him where he can sleep. Later that night the salesman can't keep from wondering if the green gorrila is real or not, untill he can't stand it no more.
So he goes down stairs and down the long hallway, grabs a blue bannana and heads toward the dock and boat. After rowing out to the island the man tosses out the blue bannana and out comes the green gorrila and the salesman reaches out and touches the gorrila on the shoulder.
Sure enough it's a real live green gorrila and boy does he go ape. Growling, snarling, nashing his teeth and beating his chest untill the salesman turns the boat around and heads for shore. When he looks back there is the gorrila swimming after him.So he rows faster and faster untill he reaches the dock, runs down the hall and out into the night. With a 600 pound green gorrila right on his heals.
Down the road he goes as fast as he can, when he comes to his car he thinks, well its worth a shot to see if it will start, and sure enough it does.
Now,going down the road at 100 mph the salesman is looking in the rearview mirror watching the green gorrila slowly catch up when he wrecks his car. Out across a feild he runs and here comes the gorrila, still very, very pissed.
Thats when he see's a cropduster and thinks to himself,"hey, I was a pilot in the Navy, I can fly that." So off into the now morning sunrise the salesman is sure he's safe when out of the cornrer of his eye he see's the green gorrila flapping it's arms and flying beside him.
Well, he's never seen a green gorrila, never the less seen one fly and sure as sugar he crashess the plane in to a wheat feild.
Out of the rubble he crawles and over a barbed wire fence, he falls face first into the mud. Exausted, out of breath and willpower the salesman says " I can't go on, this is it,I'm going to die."
Thats when the green gorrila comes running across the feild, jumps the fence, screams, growles some more, beats his chest with fire in his eyes, reaches out to the man laying in the mud and touches him on the shoulder and says "Tag, your it" turns and runs back toward the castle.
|Jan 16, 2007, 10:54 PM|
However, it was WAY more funny when the little blue guy with the funny hair that lives in the walls told me...