jokes and humor.

[Ghost 2501]

If its funny, post it,

rules: nothing illegal or disgusting!

[toesup]

But Ghosty...

There is already a section for 'humour'...

http://www.rcgroups.com/humor-71/

[boat_builder]

Believe it or not this is a real wedding anouncement that was taken from my local paper year before last. Pay close attention to the last line. :D

[Kmot]

I can see this going downhill fast....... :rolleyes:

[420TEE]

Believe it or not this is a real wedding anouncement that was taken from my local paper year before last. Pay close attention to the last line. :D
Guess they aren't from Tennessee. :D

[boat_builder]

Guess they aren't from Tennessee. :D


Sorry to say but Illinois. :o

[TOWHOOK]

Guess they aren't from Tennessee. :D

Man, I hope not. that's all we need, right 420.
She does look like she could be his sister.....ahh nevermind. :D

[420TEE]

She does look like she could be his sister.....ahh nevermind. :D
It just said not cousins. Didn't rule out sister. At least they don't have to change the initials on the feed bags in the outhouse. :D

[420TEE]

I can see this going downhill fast....... :rolleyes:
Didn't take long, did it. :p

[boat_builder]

Thats funny guys!!! Your absolutely right, it didn't say anything about being brother and sister. :D LOL :D I thought you all might get a good charge out of that one. I know when that first came out in the paper my jaw about hit the floor. It's just as funny now as it was then!! :D :)

[TOWHOOK]

Well you know, we really should be talking about RC boating rather than discussing someones family tree....even if it might appear to be self-pruning. :D

[Reid]

ok sorry but i couldn't help myself!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nmR5qpQXgw

[TOWHOOK]

:D since we are getting a kick out of wedding stuff, here is one I ran across.
Read his shirt

[boat_builder]

:D since we are getting a kick out of wedding stuff, here is one I ran across.
Read his shirt


I know she's not really what I would call a "knock-out" but man thats kind of putting things into perspective. :D

[boat_builder]

OK here's one that is relivant to boats. :D

[TOWHOOK]

I bet my boat will out run your boat :D

[boat_builder]

I bet my boat will out run your boat :D


That is the most insane thing I have ever seen! :eek: The "boat" in my picture has probably the best power to weight ratio I have ever see but the one in yours may have it beat. :D :) You might have me beat on top end but I'm betting that mine would get more milage per tank. :D :D You know what they say, "If you have to ask.....". :D

[Stu :)]

I bet my boat will out run your boat :D

Oh yeah? Really???...

Stu :)

[LtDoc]

Mixing 'Honda' and 'Toyota'?? Eeeeuuuu, nasty!
- 'Doc

'Hondyota'?
'Toyonda'?
...I don't wanna think about it.

[Stu :)]

Actually it's called a Toybota :D ;)

Stu :)

[TOWHOOK]

Ok, Ok, Here is something to ramp up the stupid factor for you guys....Stu is not the only one with a 4 x 4 watercraft. Look at these morons :D :D Maybe it's called an Arctic-yama-wave-cat-runner :p :D

[boat_builder]

Mixing 'Honda' and 'Toyota'?? Eeeeuuuu, nasty!
- 'Doc

'Hondyota'?
'Toyonda'?
...I don't wanna think about it.


Ya, thats like using CAT* anti-seize paste on a John Deere* machine. :D It causes cross moj-ination of metal components. :D :D Not a pretty sight! :D :D :D

[Stu :)]

...and just in case this hasn't done the 'rounds' yet...

New Admiralty Policy

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."

Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."

Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to the signal officer. What's the meaning of this?"

Hardy: "Sorry sir?"

Nelson (reading aloud): "England expects every person to do his duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability. What gobbledygook is this?"

Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunity employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'England' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."

Nelson : "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."

Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have been designated smoke-free working
environments."

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the main brace to steel the men before battle."

Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished Admiral. Its part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it. Full speed ahead."

Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this stretch of water."

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest, please."

Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."

Nelson: "What?"

Hardy: "Health and safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No harness. And, they said that a rope ladder doesn't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until a proper scaffolding can be erected."

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."

Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the fo'c'sle Admiral."

Nelson : "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."

Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free environment for the differently abled."

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of Admiral by playing the disability card."

Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under-represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."

Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let the crew up the rigging without crash helmets. And they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt - haven't you seen the adverts?"

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."

Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."

Nelson: "What? This is mutiny."

Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There's a couple of legal aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"

Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."

Nelson: "We're not?"

Hardy: "No, sir. The Frenchies and the Spanish are our European partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."

Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity co-coordinator hear you saying that sir. You'll be up on a disciplinary."

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy who speaks ill of your King."

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules."

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum, sodomy and the lash?"

Hardy: "As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"

Hardy: "I believe it's to be encouraged, sir."

Nelson: "In that case. Kiss me, Hardy."

--

Stu :)

[TOWHOOK]

That's either a joke or a real conversation....In this day & age I am not sure which. :confused: :)